Appeared on StyleCaster and YourTango: 9 Old-Fashioned Dating Rituals It’s Officially Time to Bring Back

"Chatting on the Phone

It’s hard to believe that phone conversations are considered “old-fashioned,” but the reality is that many daters learn more about each other from texting and social media than they do from actually talking to each other. “Using your phone to make a personal connection shows a lot more effort than merely texting,” says celebrity matchmaker and relationship expert Bonnie Winston. “Studies have shown that hearing a loved one’s voice can increase serotonin levels. I tell my clients ‘ring instead of a ping’ when asking someone out.  It may be old fashioned but it works better, because it shows you care a little more.”

Going out More

With all the great shows on Netflix (and with everything being a tad pricier than it was in the good ol’ days), it’s sooo easy to just Netflix and chill instead of going out—even for something as simple as dinner and a movie. But, Winston says, old-fashioned dating is about going out, not staying in. And it doesn’t have to be expensive. “Star gaze while listening to your favorite music in the car or go to the planetarium for a relaxing and romantic show,” she says. If you’re both outdoorsy, go hiking or ice skating… there are so many things to do that don’t include forking over a ton of cash.

Showing up with Flowers

Have you ever seen this IRL? You’re far from alone if not. Imagine meeting your date and having her or him waiting there with a bouquet of beautiful zinnias and dahlias. This is also something that says a lot but is rarely done. “They can be from a fancy florist or simply a small bouquet from the flower stand or supermarket, or even a cute small plant,” says Winston. You can also try sending them to their office or apartment the day after an amazing date.

Writing Handwritten Notes

You don’t have to be Emily Dickinson to write a sweet poem for your date. Things like love letters and notes are seldom sent anymore, but much appreciated when they are. “If you have personalized stationery, break it out,” says Winston. “Even more old-fashioned and romantic is spritzing your perfume or cologne on the letter.” It doesn’t so much matter what you write (though by all means, pour your heart out if you’re inclined); it’s the gesture that feels special and rare these days.

Minding Your Manners

The thing about manners is that they’re actually not old-fashioned; they’re timeless—so use them! This goes for both guys and girls. “I had a client who wasn’t interested in taking a woman out again because not only was she rude to the server, but she didn’t thank him for the lovely dinner,” says Winston. “Often people won’t tell you they’re offended, they just won’t ask you out again.” So, say thank you, don’t be rude, and definitely don’t text or even put your phone on the table during dinner. "

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