I’m a matchmaker, therefore I see the good and the bad of dating, men and women both. Clients come to me to find the perfect person for them. That one special guy or girl that makes them fall in love, along with the happily ever after.
My clients do date, frequently, and they are looking for long-term relationships that eventually lead to marriage and having a family. That’s why they come to me. I often find that my clients have their own specific list of what they want; Ivy League, secure financially, loves dogs, etc. and that they are looking to check all those boxes in a mate.
Before they’ve come to me, they have dated people who promise exactly what they want, but somehow never deliver on the promise, and they’re baffled.
So, I have coined a term I call “mate-baiting.” Mate-baiting means exactly that, they are dating and baiting the other person with exactly what the other person says they want. For example, maybe you go on a first date and outline all your “must haves” over dinner. There may be some chemistry and on the second date, isn’t it funny how the other person suddenly mentions, “hey I want to get married and have kids, soon as well.” Or hey, “I love camping and Indian food, and I’m looking for a committed relationship right now, too.”
In other words, they are mate-baiting. Finding out what you want and then telling you exactly what you want to hear about a long-term relationship. These people, it can be a man or woman, are not really interested in long-term, they’re just manipulating the situation.
Often, especially for women, marriage and children is the ultimate goal, and guys know that. So be careful about revealing too much in your online profile, or in social media, or on a first or second date. There’s a lot of fish in the sea, don’t get mate-baited!